Twentynine Palms

So, out of sheer boredom, and to warn future wives (as if the entire Marine Corps hasn't already warned you about the armpit of Cali), I am making a list blog about Twentynine Palms. List blogs are totally cliche, and only for people who have absolutely NOTHING to talk about, but that's me, so deal.

• I am warning you now, get over your fear of bugs. You will be surrounded by roaches of all kinds, scorpions, spiders galore, and every single other insect reject of God's. I didn't get over mine, and had my husband kill all of them. Then he deployed. Now I am stuck vacuuming up all of their little carcasses. P.S. I am throwing away my vacuum and buying a new one. Better than having to see all of them again.
• Invest in a fuel efficient car. Every single road in the desert is a bajillion miles long, and believe me, it takes 40 minutes to get to Wal Mart from base. Never thought I would see the day.
• Unless you love sand underneath your toenails and in between your toes, wear close toed shoes. Enough said.
• If you're not tan when you move out here, you will be very soon.
• Try not to wear tshirts outside for very long. Unless you think farmer's tans are sexy.
• Your left arm WILL BE darker than your right arm from driving. Get used to it.
• If you live off base and have to be at work at 8 A.M., leave your house early. Trust me on this one.
• If you absolutely have to have a decent house for cheap, live on base. Desert houses are ICKY. And way overpriced.
• If you rent, rent from a company. Renting from an individual person pretty much guarantees that you will be screwed in your deposit, repairs, pest control, etc. I learned this the hard way.
• Just FYI, base housing is BALLING. I'm in love with my house.
• Get used to having to go "down the hill" to get anything specialty. Or new for that matter. Palm Springs is where it's at. Unless you trust these funny looking desert people.
• 29palmsyardsales.com is the greatest website in this area. It will become your best friend of you're a newlywed with no money :)
• There are only like five or six radio stations. Yes, you read that right.
• Take LOTS of pictures of the sunsets. You will miss them when you leave.
• If you can while you're here, go up to the mountains. Big Bear, Lake Arrowhead, Crestline, whatever. It is worth every second.
• Go to Joshua Tree National Park, and get a yearly pass. They're only 30 bucks, and you can see all of the exhibitions they have there. The living desert is amazing.
• If you are going to Vegas for any reason at all, take Amboy Road. It is by far the most serene, relaxing, and beautiful drives I have made here. Oh, and make sure to stop by and have lunch at the Kelso-Cima Railroad Station Museum.
• Try not to take the above road at night. There are no streetlights whatsoever the entire drive to the Nevada line, and creepy just doesn't do it justice. Also, there are no police stations or fire stations all the way to Vegas, so if you get into an accident and are hurt, no one is going to know. If you have to go to Vegas at night, take the 15.
• Grow some really big gonads before you drive in downtown L.A. Jus' sayin'.
• If you have to work, I would advise you go to base if you don't have a bachelors. There are NO jobs out in town. The only jobs seem to be within MCCS.
• The roads out here are in really bad shape. They are extremely bumpy, riddled with potholes, and California doesn't seem to believe in medians. If you are like me, you will drive in the right lane because you swear every car is going to some careening across that tiny yellow line. The lesson: just expect to need new tires and/or an alignment.

I am no expert, but from the almost year that I have been here, these are my rules so far. I'm sure I will come up with many more by the time we leave. That's the nature of my OCD and boredom. Ha.

Drum roll please...

Ok so this is seriously big news for the tiny Bolling family..........

We have a kitchen table!!!!!!!!

So no one actually knows how I moved to this great state called California (ha). I shoved everything that I could in the backseat and trunk of a (very tiny) Hyundai Tiburon GT. For those who don't know, it is a very small (albeit FAST) sports car. Yea, you read right. this was my car.....

Can you imagine trying to fit 22 years into this thing????? Well I can tell ya, it ain't easy. So when I moved out here, Darren and I literally had NOTHING. Well, in a matter of 10 months, we have managed to accumulate three, count em, THREE couches, a bed, a fridge, a bookcase, tv stand, night stands, and one toolbox (that was in the KITCHEN of our last house. Gotta love the husband). And now......a table!!!!!!!! Gah! This day has been loooooooong awaited. Just figured I'd share. Because I'm the shit. :) Ok done with the nerd post.

Today's personal accomplishment

Drumroll please........
I got an 80 on my Trig quiz! Yay me! Granted, I had to take it three times to accomplish this feat, but I did it! Normally I get much higher on quizzes, but this chapter was a doozie. And I did my homework, and I'm caught up with all of my school work, and I am officially the most awesome person that ever walked the face of the Earth! (Can you picture me in a supersuit with a cape around me, with my hands on my hips and my chest thrust out?? Cuz I'm definitely doing it.) Its been mad crazy this past week for school. I don't mind taking classes online, but starting Trigonometry while in the middle of the rest of my classes!? And online, of all places?! Whew!

Well that's my supercool reason for bragging today, Darren is making dinner, and it smells really good, and my mouth is watering, and my tummy is grumbling, and yea, I have to go.

Kylie "Supercool" Bolling

It will all be worth it in the end...

School is literally sucking the life out of me right now.
And it's slow...
And it's painful...
And it's not really as bad as I make it sound.

I've just never taken online classes before, so I am having to teach myself how to get the motivation to budget my time wisely to stay on schedule. But I did homework for four hours yesterday, so I am finally back on schedule with my American History and Politics class. Now I just need to get up to date with Trig. Easier said than done, considering that I've always been a hands on learner when it comes to math, and I do much better when I'm in a classroom. But I love math, and I'm determined to get this stupid A.A. so I can finally get to work on my Bachelors.

When that day comes........I will be a totally new person. Well, sort of. Because right after I get my Bachelors, I'm starting on my Masters. Whew! I'm a career student! It doesn't matter though, I will finally be able to get a job with an engineering firm. It's just taking forever. Now granted, I am off schedule because I decided to enlist in the military, and when that didn't work out, I was six months behind schedule. And it also doesn't help that I had no idea what I wanted to do when I went into college, so I didn't take the necessary math and physics classes that I would have if I started college with a decision. So, after December, when I become human again when I graduate, all I need is Calc 1,2,and 3, and Physics 1,2,and 3. Darnit. But that's good, because I'll have my A.A., and be one step closer to University of California!

It's worth it when you get the end result.... isn't it?

Kylie "When-is-this-gonna-end?" Bolling

Things I love and things I don't

Things I love:

• My husband. This is cliche, I know, but I really do. He gives me pretty much anything I want, within reason. But I do the same for him. We work really well together.
• Collecting Barbies. This is the child coming out in me, I guess. But I really don't think there's anything better than spending 50 bucks on a Barbie you can never play with. :) What can I say? I like dolls.
• Reading. This is killing me right now. My favorite think in the world in curling up with a really good book on a really rainy day. But living in the desert, this plan is shot to hell. Oh well. I did however, see my first cloud since moving from Florida. But that was over a week ago. I'm having withdrawls again.
• Stupid T.V. shows. Being unemployed and a student, there's only so much homework you can do at one time. With no car, the only option you have when you take a break is to watch t.v. I watch Seinfeld (I can see you cringing!)...a lot. Like it's all over my DVR.
• Furniture. This might seem strange to some, but until you have absolutely nothing else except an ugly colored loveseat and a bed, you start to appreciate all of those people who have furniture. Its amazing how much you take advantage of things that seem so normal to you at one time.
• Decorating! I have a secret fabulous interior designer inside of me, but the no-so-secret outside of me doesn't have the money to satisfy the inner designer. So I am forced to dream by way of HGTV. Which I also watch...a lot. My husband does not know this.
• Food Network. See above. Same applies.
• Vegas! There's something about all the tacky lights and even tackier people that I just love. Hopefully this does not reflect how tacky I can sometimes be.
• My dog. He is the funniest thing in the world. No, seriously. Like even funnier than Seinfeld reruns. For those of you who don't like Seinfeld, insert something really funny here and replace. :)

Things I do not love:

• This whole Twilight fever. Call me crazy, but I don't see the appeal of hormonal vampire and the desperado who loves him.
• Justin Beiber. Now, don't laugh, but I do really like his songs. Just not so much him. He looks like he's seven, and he keeps getting caught tounging other celebritweens. Not sexy.
• School, at the moment. I have a love/hate relationship with school. Right now its hate. Too much work, not enough time. (Now scold me about being on this blog instead of doing my homework)
• My internet company. They lied to me about not being able to get broadband, so now I'm stuck with satellite internet that's super slow and costs 40 dollars more a month than broadband, because they won't let me out of my contract. Thanks Wildblue!
• The desert. This place is seriously like The Hills Have Eyes come to life. I thought there were funny looking people in Florida! I don't even have to go to the flea market to see them here! (That one's for you Daddy!)
• Living in the desert. Too dry, no rain, not fun.
• The critters of the desert. Pretty much everything has more than four legs, which I do not like.
• Pretty much everything about the desert.
• Not living in Florida.

Are we seeing a pattern yet? Tootles!

Kylie "I-have-nothing-better-to-blog-about" Bolling

Top 10 best books I've ever read

I have decided that I am going to start a "Top 10" theme on my blog. Movies, books, foods, whatever comes into my vast and infinite mind. So for my first installment, I have chosen my all time favorite thing, the book. Call me what you want, but I truly believe that the best thing in the world is curling up on a rainy day and getting lost in the world of fiction. I can't remember who said it, but there is a saying that says "You know when you've read a really good book when you turn the last page and feel as though you've lost a very good friend." So without further ado, I present the Top 10 Best Books I've Ever Read...

10. You've Been Warned by James Patterson This book is by far one of the weirdest I've ever read. It's literally a grabbing-your-seat, trying-to-force-yourself-not-to-read-ahead kind of book. Dead father, hearing voices, and a forbidden affair...does it get any better than this?

9. Bad Astronomy by Phillip Plait

Now, I'm by far the biggest nerd I've ever met, so of course a science book is going to be on my list. Plait is delightfully cynical, and refutes all of the nonsense that people come up with in regards to the infinite universe. Here he refutes "evidence" that the NASA moon landing was a fake, the "proof" of Astrology, and Hollywood's ten worst examples of really bad astronomy.

8. The Night I Disappeared by Julie Reese DeaverThis is actually a young-adult novel, and one of two Julie Reece Deaver books that are on my list. Jamie is best friends with Webb, a guy who is always there for her, and she seems to be falling for him. And it's not until she has to move halfway across the country from him that she realizes that Webb isn't exactly who he says he is....... A not-so-typical teen novel that, even though I'm way too old for it, it is still a huge joy to read (and reread).

7. A Long Way Gone: Memoirs of a Boy Soldier by Ishmael BeahBy far one of the most disturbing books I've ever read, while still being deep and staying with me long after I finished it. His brutal honesty, and the imagery he uses in his writing make you feel as though you're there with him doing the corrupt government's bidding, wielding AK-47s, and stuffing yourself full of the drugs that they said were good for you. A wonderful book about redemption, survival, and hope.

6. Nineteen Minutes by Jodi Picoult

Another pretty disturbing book. It tells the story of an outcast; a boy who was made fun of his whole life, and then suffered the ultimate betrayal by his bast friend. He finally had had enough, and went on a Columbine-style shooting spree, shooting everyone he thought was responsible for his depression. The ending, however, will blow your mind.... Definitely a must-read.

5. Wildwood by Drusilla CampbellThis book is totally my best friend and I when we get older. Hahaha. Thirty years ago, after no longer being able to handle the sexual advances of her trashy neighbor, Hannah pushes him actidentally over a cliff to his death. Hannah and her two best friends swear never to mention it again. No one in the town was particularly upset about this, so the police let it go as an accident. The nightmare of that day reverberates throughout the lives of the three friends, until one of them is no longer able to hold the silence. A wonderful book about the power of friendship and forgiveness.

4. Say Goodnight, Gracie by Julie Reece Deaver

I am a girl of my word, and this is the second Julie Reece Deaver book on my list. Again, this is a young adult novel, but I could still read this book and love it as much as I did when I was 13. To this day, it is the one of only two books that has made me cry. Morgan (The Night I Disappeared) is the main character of this book, and she and her best friend, Jimmy have been inseperable since birth. But when Jimmy is killed by a drunk driver, she has to teach herself how to live her life without him.

3. The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls

Alas, this is the second book that has made me cry. If you really love your father, and he is your hero like mine is, it will make you cry too. 100% money back guarantee. Jeanette Walls and her family bounce around the country, running from the creditors (or the landlord) when they come calling. Her father is a drunk, but in her eyes, he is a superhero. Untimately they move in with his mother, who is horrible, and Jeanette and her brother run away to New York and make their dreams come true. Her parents follow them, and end up homeless (and happy). I'm not going to spoil the ending, but I can promise you that this book will stay with you for a long time after you close it.

2. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince by J.K. RowlingAgain, being the nerd that I am, I had to put my all time favorite fictional character on my list. Yes my friends, the phenomenon of Harry Potter. I love these books so much that I did a research paper my sophmore year in college about him. This book in particular is one of my favorites. The more the series progressed, the more dark and adult-like the books became. Dumbledore dying?? I mean come on! Who was expecting that?? Definitely not me.

And now, the Number One all time best book I've ever read........

1. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Another Harry Potter!!! I'm truly sorry if you don't like the Harry Potter series, but no lie, this is the best book I have ever, ever, ever read. I (refer to nerd comment above) love the mythology and symbolism that this book offers. Kids read it thinking it's just a really good book, and little do they know that its chocked full of smart stuff too! J.K. Rowling is just a genius. I give her serious props for coming up with a series that goes as deep as this one does. If you haven't read it, I strongly urge you to do so immediately, or bad things will happen. (Ok that's not true, but seriously, you should totally read it.)

And that concludes the Top Ten Best Books Ever According to Me. Hope you enjoyed!

Kylie "Book-worm" Moody